There was a Wiener from Van Nuys,
Who bit people's hands, ankles and thighs.
His Mom just fretted
And sometimes sweated,
As his bite was bigger than his size.
There once was a dog of great genius
Who had a rather large penis.
His mind started to wander
When he saw a bitch yonder
So he ran to his Milo de Venus.
We're here to honor Nemo of the Valley,
Who owned a Maisel that's our Sally.
At a blonde hand model he railed
While clicking his 19-inch nails.
His endowment was longer than his tally.
There once was a dog, Nemo Wiener.
To blondes no one could be meaner.
He snapped and he munched
And he chewed and he crunched.
Thank God, it was no misdemeanor.
There was a dog owned by Sally
Whose penis was a big as the Valley.
His package, forever prized...
Till Sally had it excised...
So went his chance for a big finale.
There once was a dog, little Nemo,
Whose penis was renowned and so primo!
Sally put him in hats
And antlers and spats
But she could not hide his floor show!
Our Nemo was truly well-bred
A Wiener from tail to his head.
He'd roll over and fetch
With not even a kvetch
But his latest trick now is "play dead."
A dachshund named Nemo once ate
Hot peppers right off of my plate.
He farted out fire
Which launched him up higher
And now he's at St. Peter's gate.
A cranky old A.D. named Jean
Created a terrible scene.
She uttered foul curses
About writing verses
But now she's a Limerick queen!
There once was a Wiener named Plopper
Whose penis was considered a whopper
But then came cute Nemo
Who had a fat peno
Now each of their dicks are show stoppers.
There once were some girls who made game shows,
Who did not find their way with a brown nose.
The other bimbos would travel
And ethics unravel
With the famous celebs they'd rub elbows.
There once were some friends who loved pups
Who'd pot-luck with Jane bringing cups.
Though the dogs sometimes changed...
The great friends would remain...
Through the years but it was never enups.
There once was a wool-spinning mamma
And a writer who loved use of comma.
The two did unite
When the "Prices Were Right."
Now, one cruises and the other has Llamas.
There once was a girl, moved to Cali
Who rented nearby NoHo alley.
'Twas then she met Jane
Her life, never the same.
And now she writes Limericks for Sally.
There once was a Wienerpalooza
Where I thought might be good hors 'd'ouvres.
'Cuz Sally's the hostess
Oh yeah, she's the mostess.
It's as good as the art at the Louvre.
So now I'm addicted to Limericks
I can't stop myself from this gibberish.
Unless my lap crashes
And burns down to ashes
I'll be rhyming until I'm a dimwits.
A girl who had lots of schtick,
Once tried to write a limerick.
Stabbed herself with the pen
Was never heard from again.
Now all we have left is her rhetoric.
There once was a doxy named Nemo
Whose breath was as toxic as chemo.
He was loved in the past
But you felt you'd been gassed
And he'd benefit more from some Beano.